So, so far off!

So, I've not weighed since I lost weight from my stomach virus.  I'm pretty sure I've put a few of those pounds back on.  ugggg.  I'm also guilty of not drinking all of my shakes, too.  Then, there's the exercise thing.  I keep telling myself...tomorrow I WILL exercise!  but, I never do.  :(  I need a swift kick in the rear to get me going.  I know that me not losing weight is my own fault.  I have all the tools.  Visalus is the best tool I've found and I'm not making the most of it.  Why do I do this to myself?  It's almost like I'm afraid of being successful.  I know that sounds strange but I don't know how else to describe it.  I NEED and WANT to do this for myself, my husband and my son!  Maybe if I posted a picture of myself or my actual weight that would be motovation?!  hmmm...maybe not.  I know it's depressing, I'm depressed about how I look constantly.  Looking in the mirror is depressing, trying on clothes is depressing, seeing my cute "skinny" clothes in my closet is depressing.  I need more blog friends to keep me accountable.  :(